Crystalline Expectations
by Crimson's Void
Summary: Two people who long to be together are torn apart by foolish House Rivalry at Hogwarts. Both have appearnaces and a reputation to uphold among their peers, but is it really worth it if it keeps them separated?
1. Frigid Contemplation

**Crystalline Expectations**

**By SZF**

* * *

**Disclaimer:** I do not, nor will I ever, own the wonderful world of Harry Potter and its darling, lovely people, magical and muggle alike. All rights go to JK Rowling and Warner Brothers Studios.

**A/N:** A fanfic written for the Forbidden Relationship Competition on the HPFC forum. This will be a multichapter fic, and seeing as it's for a competition, reviews would be greatly appreciated ^^

Also, for the sake of writer's influence, this fic is AU from the fifth book onwards; the fight in the Ministry took place, and Voldemort was defeated then and there, no Horcruxual complications necessary XD

Also, a hand to my lovely beta cupcake0118 - she's the best beta I have ever had! X3

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**Chapter One: Frigid Contemplation**

* * *

A low sigh sounded through the otherwise silent November air, creating a small puff of breath visible to the human eye as its creator stared with a rather melancholy expression across the Black Lake. Icy green eyes matched its reflective surface, supressing a flood of emotion that longed to be let loose upon the world around her; it was better this way, of that she was certain, but…

She couldn't help but feel so _untouched._ And she wanted to be touched; badly. Even if it was just to feel his hand brush across hers by mere accident while they sat together in Potions class. Or the warmth of his breath across her cheek as he caught her when she stumbled carelessly in the forest during Care of Magical Creatures, a worried glance and an "are you okay?" sent her way.

The thought of that encounter caused her heart to clench painfully as she reminisced the way his hands had been placed firmly, yet gently, on her waist, steadying her balance. Her palms pressed flat against his chest, eyes wide in surprise and face slightly flushed. His bright blue eyes scanning her over with concern, watching for any sign that she was harmed. That had been when it started. Two years ago today, in fact.

That had been the day she'd begun to fall for Colin Creevey. Hard. Irrevocably. Completely. Any adjective would do, really. But from that day forward, Astoria Greengrass had been completely under his spell, whether he knew it or not.

Although she had a sinking suspicion he did. She'd glance up at mealtimes to catch him watching her, only for his eyes to shoot back down to his food in embarrassment. He'd eyed her flirty interaction with other guys their year with barely concealed jealousy and depression. All in all, the Slytherin girl wasn't sure what to make of it. Did he share her feelings and was just too shy to act upon them?

She watched him now, sitting on the other side of the lake with a group of friends around a small, blue fire roasting small marshmallows they'd probably pilfered from the kitchens and laughing merrily. They hadn't noticed her, and for that Astoria was grateful. She was content to lean against a willow tree that had lost all its leaves, wistfully dreaming about what things could be like between them if he'd been sorted Slytherin or she into Gryffindor.

He'd grown up a lot since that first year. His once overeager attitude had become a rather laid back, easygoing manner with a penchant for doing his best in every class while maintaining fun in his free time. He no longer obsessed over Harry Potter, the Boy Who Lived. Instead, he focused his interests in Quidditch and reading, an odd combination, but an endearing one nonetheless. He was the best Chaser the Gryffindor team had, and was so well read he nearly rivaled the reputation of recent graduate Hermione Granger, versed in both Muggle and Wizard books alike.

Not to mention he'd become quite handsome as time passed, too. The scraggly head of blonde hair he'd been home to in First Year had turned into a rather ruffled-from-sex style, whether by accident or intention she wasn't sure. His eyes had become filled with less childish fancies, instead holding a barely perceptible trouble maker smirk behind a rather grown up maturity that Astoria found quite attractive. And his body…

Astoria shivered slightly, her cheeks flushing a light pink as her mind flashed back to that one morning last May when she'd accidentally walked in on him in the Prefect's bathroom, in the process of filling up the tub while shirtless. She'd had all of ten seconds to take in his physique of well-defined pectorals and nicely chiseled abs before she'd turned beet red and left like a bat out of hell, not giving him enough time, other than to shift his features into a vaguely astonished and confused expression.

Another sigh slipped past the seventeen-year-old's lips as her eyes transferred from the impossible object of her affectations to the surface of the lake, a melancholy air slipping into her delightful reverie.

They could never be together. It was impossible. There were too many factors against them. Most of them she could overcome; they were influences from outside of Hogwarts, and she'd find a way to push past them. But if she ever wanted to have a chance with him before the outside world absorbed them, she'd have to find a way to break through the House Rivalry. There had once been a time when she despised the House of red and gold, and relished watching fights between its members (more so the ones where the snakes triumphed), but now she found it an infernal, fickle, troubling, meddlesome factor she would be just fine without, thank you very much.

Groaning in frustration, Astoria dropped her head into her hands and thumped the back of it against the tree. Peeking through her fingers and back across the lake, she froze when she noticed a certain head of gold hair turned in her direction, sky blue eyes locked on her own minty green. The temperature of her skin rose quite suddenly, and she lurched to her feet and hurried back up to the castle, ignoring the crunching noises her shoes made on the frostbitten ground; they resembled to closely the shattering of her resolve to stay away from him.

* * *

**A/N:** Fair warning; each chapter will have a song responsible for fueling my mind and imagination. Inspiration for this chapter was derived from the song **"Untouched"** by **"The Veronicas"**. Lyrics and a YT link can be found below.

* * *

I go ooh ooh, you go ah ah  
lalalalalalalala

I can't lie lie lie lie lie lie  
I wanna wanna wanna get get get what I want  
Don't stop  
Give me give me give me what you got got  
Cause I can't wait wait wait any more more more more  
Don't even talk about the consequence  
Cause right now you're the only thing that's making any sense to me  
And I don't give a damn what they say, what they think think  
Cause you're the only one who's on my mind  
I'll never ever let you leave me  
I'll try to stop time for ever, never wanna hear you say goodbye (bye bye bye)

I feel so untouched  
And I want you so much  
That I just can't resist you  
It's not enough to say that I miss you  
I feel so untouched right now  
Need you so much somehow  
I can't forget you  
Been going crazy from the moment I met you

Untouched  
And I need you so much

See you, breathe you, I want to be you  
Alalalala alalalala  
You can take take take take take time time  
To live live the way you gotta gotta live your life  
Give me give me give me all of you you  
Don't be scared  
I'll see you through the loneliness of one more more more  
Don't even think about what's right or wrong, wrong or right  
'Cause in the end it's only you and me and no one else is gonna be around  
To answer all the questions left behind  
And you and I are meant to be so even if the world falls down today  
You've still got me to hold you up up  
And I will never let you down (down)

I feel so untouched  
And I want you so much  
That I just can't resist you  
It's not enough to say that I miss you  
I feel so untouched right now  
Need you so much somehow  
I can't forget you  
Been going crazy from the moment I met you

Untouched, untouched, untouched, untouched, untouched  
Alalalala alalalala  
Untouched  
Alalalala alalalala

I feel so untouched  
And I want you so much  
That I just can't resist you  
It's not enough to say that I miss you  
I feel so untouched right now  
Need you so much somehow  
I can't forget you  
Been going crazy from the moment I met you

I feel so untouched  
And I want you so much  
That I just can't resist you  
It's not enough to say that I miss you  
I feel so untouched right now  
Need you so much somehow  
I can't forget you  
Been going crazy from the moment I met you

Untouched, untouched, untouched

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www . youtube watch?v =JfuUIK Wyt2w (just remove the spaces :P)


	2. Of Potions And Fungi

**Disclaimer:** I do not, nor will I ever, own the wonderful world of Harry Potter and its darling, lovely people, magical and muggle alike. All rights go to JK Rowling and Warner Brothers Studios.

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**Chapter Two: Of Potions And Fungi**

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"Instructions for Amortentia can be found on page three hundred ninety four in your potions text. You are senior students; I expect that you know where the required ingredients are stored. Vials are on my desk at the front. Everyone must hand in a vial with their name attached and one piece of parchment detailing what scents you experienced with the finished product at the end of class. You may begin now."

With that and a bat-like swish of his robes, Severus Snape strode to the aforementioned desk and took a seat, pointedly ignoring the students as they stared, dumbfounded, at their professor.

Shaking her head with a sigh, Astoria turned to her partner, supressing the stutter which threatened her speech.

"I'll go grab the ingredients if you get the vials?"

Colin responded with a nod and an easy smile, sliding off his side of the bench to fetch the small crystal containers. Taking a deep breath to calm her vaulting stomach, Astoria got to her feet and headed for the store cupboard. Wrinkling her nose at the stale smell that always accompanied preserved items, she quickly gathered up what was needed for both their potions and traversed between the tables back to her own working station. Colin had already returned with both vials, each one labeled with his recognizable scrawl formed into their names. Giving him a slight smile, she deposited her armload of materials onto the work table. Taking a seat while holding back a blush that threatened to spill across her cheeks, Astoria averted her eyes and got to work.

* * *

"Greengrass?"

The blonde Slytherin jumped in surprise at the sound of her name, and her gaze flew from the sight of large, fluffy snowflakes to the boy standing a few feet away. They'd been paired together in Care of Magical Creatures (_'Hagrid, I want to kill you and hug you at the same time!'_) and sent into the forest to find some magical root or herb; Astoria couldn't remember which exactly.

No, she'd been too busy day-dreaming and avoiding staring at her partner, who was presently eyeing her with interest. Mentally spitting out various obscenities, she blinked a few times before answering.

"What is it, Creevey?"

He shrugged lightly, still watching her in curiosity. "You've been staring off into space for the past ten minutes with such a blank expression. Are you alright?"

Had she been so obvious? Merlin's pants!

"O-oh. No, I'm fine. I was just watching the snow. It's the first of the season, and it just looks so pretty."

Colin nodded, smiling as he followed her gaze. "It is pretty. I haven't seen flakes that big in a while."

Silence then fell back on the two as Astoria pretended to look for the herb while Colin actually _did_ try to find it. They continued on this way for several moments before, on a sudden rush of Carpe Diem, Astoria took a deep breath and asked a question she'd been dying to know the answer to.

"So what did you smell in the Amortentia?"

Her inquisition seemed to catch Colin off his guard; his eyes widened imperceptibly, and he stumbled slightly over a hidden tree root, regaining his balance with the trunk of the offending plant. Head tilted in curiosity, he glanced over at her.

"Trying to make small talk or genuinely curious?"

"A bit of both, really."

"Ahuh. Well, in that case, I smelled peppermint, the ocean, and some flower that I couldn't recognize right off the bat." He shrugged lightly and crouched, brushing away some stray leaves and a bit of snow near the base of the tree. He began inspecting the fungi that grew there with feigned boredom before giving Astoria a sidelong glance.

"Do you think these are the mushrooms we were supposed to find?"

Astoria hummed, walking over and crouching down next to him to look at the spores, opening up her small reference guide to check. "Looks like it. Should we pick some and take them back to class?"

Her Gryffindor partner nodded slightly, removing the mushrooms from their current spot of growth to place them in his coat pocket, then handed some Astoria's way for her to do the same. Soon enough, they were back on their way towards Hagrid's hut, fungi in hand and another silence between them. Till it was broken again, of course.

"So what did you smell in the Amortentia, Greengrass? You've made me curious."

"Ah… " _Shit! Lie, quick! "_… parchment, hot chocolate, and honeysuckle."

"Hmm. Interesting combination."

"I thought the same thing."

Colin opened his mouth to speak again, but stopped short, closing it as a thoughtful look passed over his features. Whatever he'd been about to say would have to wait, as they'd made it back to the rest of the class. They deposited their findings with their hairy, half-giant teacher before going to sit with their respective Housemates.

Sighing lightly, Astoria glanced sideways towards the Gryffindor side of the clearing. Her heart made a slight flutter as she noticed Colin glance her way while turning to speak with a friend. The easy smile he shot towards her made it even worse, and she fixed her gaze back onto the frozen, snow-laden ground as she blushed.

_'Thank Salazar for this cold weather.'_

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A/N – Inspiration for this chapter was derived from the song **"Crush"** by **"David Archuleta"**. Lyrics and a YT link can be found below.

* * *

I hung up the phone tonight

Something happened for the first time  
Deep inside  
It was a rush  
What a rush  
'Cause the possibility  
That you would ever feel the same way  
About me  
It's just too much  
Just too much

Why do I keep running from the truth?  
All I ever think about is you  
You got me hypnotized  
So mesmerized  
And I've just got to know

[chorus:]

Do you ever think  
When you're all alone  
All that we could be?  
Where this thing could go?  
Am I crazy or falling in love?  
Is it real or just another crush?  
Do you catch a breath  
When I look at you?  
Are you holding back  
Like the way I do?  
'Cause I'm trying, trying to walk away  
But I know this crush ain't going away  
Going away

Has it ever crossed your mind  
When we're hanging,  
Spending time, girl, are we just friends?  
Is there more?  
Is there more? (Is there more)  
See it's a chance we've gotta take  
'Cause I believe that we can make this  
Into something that'll last  
Last forever  
Forever

[chorus]

Why do I keep running from the truth?  
(Why do I keep running)  
All I ever think about is you  
(All I ever think about)  
You got me hypnotized  
(Hypnotized)  
So mesmerized  
(mesmerized)  
And I've just got to know

Do you ever think (ever think)  
When your all alone (all alone)  
All that we could be,  
Where this thing could go (goooo)  
Am I crazy or falling in love, (crazy)  
Is this real or just another crush (another crush)  
Do you catch a breath,  
When I look at you,  
Are you holding back,  
Like the way I do,  
Cause' I'm trying and trying to walk away,  
But I know this crush ain't' going away (this crush ain't)  
Going away (going away)  
Going away (when you're all alone)  
All that we could be,  
Where this thing could go (going away)  
Going away

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www. yout m/wat ch?v =_t m9_u cGSTw


	3. Determination

**Disclaimer: **I don't own. Simple as that

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**A/N: **Also, I apologize for such a sporadic space in updates. Life's caught up with me it seems. Also, it's about ten at night while I write this and I'm fueled by Pepsi and music. You'll find out the song after the chapter.

* * *

**Chapter Three: Determination**

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_The Evening Before..._

* * *

"_Astoria, what are you thinking?!"_

"_Well, she isn't, obviously."_

"_Hah. Obviously doesn't cut it. Seriously Tori, a __**Gryffindor**__?! You fancy a Gryffindor, of all people?!"_

_Astoris shuffled uncomfortably on the bed as she was shot snide remarks and disbelieving inquiries from her three Slytherin friends. Sighing lightly, she pushed her hair out of her eyes and glanced at them pleadingly._

"_Can we please just stop? It's late, I'm tired, and we have a potions exam tomorrow morning. It's nothing, I swear. I just thought he might be a good snog is all. Nothing's happened, so don't worry. Nothing __**will **__happen. Alright?"_

_The three other girls looked at each other with doubtful looks before sighing and nodding, heading off to their separate beds. Letting out a breath she didn't realize she'd been holding in, Astoria pulled shut the curtains of her four poster and slid into bed, gazing at the wall of fabric in slight depression._

_'Well, I was right. Nothing will happen.'_

* * *

Groaning lightly, Astoria rubbed a bit of sleep from her eyes as she left the dungeons and headed upwards in the ancient castle. Stifling a yawn, she thought back to the potions exam with a rather grim expression, suddenly realizing she'd made more than a few mistakes she shouldn't have. Sighing forlornly, she shrugged it off and turned a corner; in her half-asleep and rather frustrated daze, she'd accidentally caught the toe of her shoe on a loose stone in the floor and went flying forward, her bag and it's contents crashing to the ground and spilling everywhere, surely as she would have any second now-...

Except for two sudden, strong hands placed directly on her hips and pulling her back to a proper standing position. Confused, she turned around and spotted the current aggressor of her every thought standing just a few inches away from her person, a worried look on his face.

"You alright, Greengrass? You almost landed flat on your face!"

Colin did seem genuinely concerned for her well-being. Even more confused than previous (and now with a blush added to the mix), she shook her head lightly to clear the cobwebs, then nodded as she directed a tight smile in his direction.

"I'm fine. Thanks, Creevey." She mumbled, kneeling down to the ground to gather her things. After a moment's silence, she was joined by her impromptu rescuer in picking it all up. They happened to reach for a quill at the same time, Colin's hand landing on her own. Gasping in slight shock, she snatched her hand back, then bit down on her bottom lip as she felt a heat creep over her body.

The boy across from her observed her with a slightly raised eyebrow, then shrugged somewhat, picking up the quill she'd abandoned in her haste and holding it towards her. It was quickly stowed in the bag, along with the rest of Astoria's belongings.

The two teens now sat crouched in the middle of an otherwise empty hallway halfway between the dungeons and the main floor of the castle. A rather awkward silence hung over them before the braver of the two broke it, helping his female counterpart to her feet with an easy smile and a strong grip.

"So how do you think you did on the potions test?"

"It's none of your business, Creevey."

That rather sharp remark caught Colin off guard, and he eyed Astoria with a slightly narrowed gaze. The blonde girl did nothing to repair anything she'd broken, and instead brushed past him rather roughly, her head lowered to hide not only the furious red her face had become, but also the slight watering of her eyes as one crystalline little tear rolled down her cheek and onto the stone floor.

_'Nothing's ever going to happen. I might as well make sure of it now.'_

* * *

A rush of cool, night air that smelled of winter brushed across the grounds of Hogwarts and circled the ancient castle itself. It blew through the rather airy astronomy tower as well, blowing about the robes of a certain fair-haired Slytherin as she leaned against the railing and closed her eyes, relishing the feel of it across her skin. Sighing lightly as she rested her chin in her palm, she opened her minty-green orbs to gaze up at the midnight sky, locking onto the form of the moon in the sky, a sharp, clear slice in an endless sea of black.

"Just like it seems my heart is... cut open, with a hole growing wider as time goes by..."

"What was that?"

Gasping in slight surprise, Astoria spun around with her wand at the ready, only to find Colin standing behind her and with her wand poking rather sharply into his well-toned chest.

"Ow. That kind of hurts, actually. You know, I bet you could kill someone just by poking them with a wand almost as surely as the killing curse, don't you think? They're quite pointy."

With a slight, dismissive hum and a light feeling of despair in her belly, Astoria stowed her wand back into her robes and turned back around, leaning once more onto the railing as she turned her attentions back to the moon.

"... Just going to ignore me?"

"What do you want, Creevey?"

"I wanna know what's up. You've been rather dour later."

"I've been fine. What would you care, anyways? We barely know each other."

"Well, you're my potions partner. If you suddenly died, I'd be stuck suffering through Snape alone. That'd be pure torture, it would. But seriously, all kidding aside, I care because unlike most other Slytherins, you seem like a genuinely nice person. It's a rare thing to find."

"... That's it? You're just curious to see if I'm going to the dark side like my fellow housemates?"

"Well... no. For some reason, I've come to see you as a sort of acquaintance. You could be a friend, actually, but, as you pointed out, we barely know each other."

That caught Astoria rather off guard, and she turned to face him with slightly wide eyes and her head tilted somewhat.

_'He actuall- No! No no no no no!'_

"... W-well, I appreciate your concern, Creevey, b-but as I said earlier, it's none of your business. Now leave me be!"

With that and a disgruntled huff, she fled the tower and stormed through the castle, just narrowly avoiding Filch and his awful cat on her way to the dungeons.

_'You are not mine to have, so I will rid myself of you as I see fit!'_

* * *

**A/N: **Inspiration for this song was derived from **"Stay Away"** by **Secondhand Serenade**. Lyrics and a YT link below for your reference pleasure.

* * *

Something isn't right,  
I'm losing faith in everything I know,  
what do I know?

You told me I should fight,  
not be self destructive thinking I should go,  
what do i know?

Stay away from me!  
I need you too badly,  
and it's tearing me apart!  
Won't you stay a part of me?  
I need you too badly,  
I need you too badly,  
I need you too badly.

I wrote this song tonight,  
just to feel like I was not alone,  
But I am alone.  
I don't have the right  
to ask for your forgiveness on the phone,  
Cause I am alone.

Stay away from me!  
I need you too badly,  
and it's tearing me apart!  
Won't you stay a part of me?  
I need you too badly,

I need you too badly,  
I need you too badly.

This feelings never ending,  
and I can't keep pretending,  
that it's you I want,  
that it's you.  
I'm not okay,  
I'm not okay.

Stay away from me!  
I need you too badly,  
and it's tearing me apart!  
Won't you stay a part of me?  
I need you too badly,  
I need you too badly,  
I need you too badly.

* * *

w ww. you tub e wat ch? v=n oEs ICp 05yc


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